Monday night Mark Strand came to my poetry craft class and then gave a reading (and signed my book!). I had been having difficulty writing my five rules for life, but then he said something (a lot of things) that just sparked something in me. His wisdom became rule #1.
1) “Remain mysterious to yourself so you can keep making discoveries.”
Surprise yourself in new ways of thinking. Try hobbies or activities you don’t know anything about and lay outside your comfort zone or that you don’t think you would enjoy. You never know! Always take the chance and collect experiences. Put yourself in different situations and see how you react. Be spontaneous!
2) It is better to be kind and forgotten than remembered for your cruelty.
If my future children learn one thing in life, I hope it’s this. I was thinking the other day of all the mean things certain people said and did to me in middle school and those things stood out over anything nice those people ever did with their lives. And then I was struck with the terrifying thought that I could be that negative memory for someone else. I consider myself a very kind, generous person, but kindness doesn’t seem to adhere to memory as well as cruelty. I guess this is sort of like “do unto others,” but on a slightly deeper level. Think about your words and actions. Before you fly off the handle or join in on teasing someone, remember that THIS could be the one thing they remember about you.
3) Don’t wear a mask (unless it’s a costume party!).
Be who you are- flaws and all- and you will (eventually, bit by bit) attract the right people into your life. People are attracted to happiness and confidence. If you’re happy with who you are, no one else can question that.
4) Never miss an opportunity that involves travel or cake.
They always lead to something good, even if they’re resulting from a less than ideal situation.
5) Have a good relationship with God.
I’m not the preachy type. I believe your relationship with God is a private, personal thing that does not need to be discussed with anyone else. It’s between you and God, but it’s important anyway. Even on the worst days, find something to thank God for- tiny as it may seem. Remember that your plan may not be his plan and prayers are answered on His time- not yours. That’s easy to forget in this age of immediacy and instant gratification.
I don’t think that’s a half bad way to live. I’ve got got recommend Mark’s New Selected Poems. I think he’s very accessible. I keep reading this book over and over and it keeps inspiring me.
[...] is the official one year anniversary of Adventures of Superalzy! Since I started this blog on my Five Rules for Life, inspired by something Mark Strand said to me, I’d like to share one of my favorite poems of [...]